they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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