white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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