I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
