So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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