matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
high people should be assigned attendants
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
