eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I want to fling myself into the sun
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
