tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I just had sex on a roof
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
