Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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