Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
