My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Randomize
