Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
