You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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