If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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