he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
