So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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