I hope mine doesn't look like that
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I deserve this hangover.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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