quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
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