He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Randomize
