Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize