I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
