you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
