so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
