We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize
