I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Randomize
