Will you blow on my dice?
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Life is so much better after having sex.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
