They should really pass out barf bags in church
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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