I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
