i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
