So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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