i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
He kissed a someone with a penis
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize