At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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