you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
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