WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
