I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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