I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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