FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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