Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize
