did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
