Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize
