And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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