Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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