But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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