Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
