I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
