birth control should be required to get into college
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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