dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Randomize