I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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