is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
We have so much sex to catch up on
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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