I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
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