I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I'm like, not good at living.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
